Control

            Once I thought I was normal. Went to school, played games, watched TV, normal kid stuff. My parents have their ideal jobs and their nice house with 2.5 (actually 3) kids. But lately, something’s been off. I don’t think anyone else has noticed this but our decisions aren’t our own. I would come home from school and realize that I don’t remember what I did at school that day. I would see my younger brothers start walking towards the games, but within seconds, they’ll run to read a book or use the bathroom. I’ve caught my parents once working with hobbies that they once hated. Everything is becoming weird and contradictory as if someone else is controlling us.

            One day, I really wanted to play guitar. Before I picked up the stringed instrument by its long, slender neck, I suddenly found myself walking to the kitchen, picking through the leftover soggy, lime pancakes my mom made this morning. Another time, I wanted to try using my parents’ workout tools, but found myself right before touching the tools suddenly in front of an easel with a smooth-handled paint brush in hand. No one else sees what I’ve been seeing. There is some greater force at work here.

            Randomly, new furniture, fancier furniture would appear that neither of my parents would remember buying before. I once caught my mom complaining about not being able to pay the next month’s bills and within a few minutes, I find her realizing we have couple hundred thousand appearing in the account. My father would joke about it. “You’ve hit the motherlode!” I’ve realized more and more things outside of that. All of the books have the same cover, only different based on genre. No matter who you are or what your family background is, you all made the same kind of dishes. There were only about 24 kinds of food Mom would make (with slight variations to each, but still…).

            What is this world then? Of people who talk to everyone no matter what their personality or interests were? Where someone or something outside is laughing at us and working on creating an ideal world outside of our own control? How should I feel about this discovery I’ve made? Happy? Sad? Worried that I might be going crazy with this bit of observation I’ve made? I hardly understand what my life is supposed to be based around. A child meant for something great? Someone who sees past the lies of this world and wants to find the truth of the real? For all I know, this could all be just a game on a computer and some kid my own age is trying to decide what I want out of life.

Today, I was moved to the computer and am left to type. Type about what? Well, the topic is nonfiction writing, so I chose this paranoid feeling I have. It’s a warning. Everyone is being manipulated to be these “ideal” people. When you try to ignore a need, you’re forced to satisfy it. When you try to avoid a chore, your parents aren’t the ones who force you to it. It’s this invisible force of this world that we live in. This world is why we forget the things in school and at our careers. This world forces us to follow the rules of this invisible force. And I believe I’m the only one who notices. Whether this force knows that I know… Only time will tell…

(Written in the viewpoint of a Sim from the popular video game series, The Sims)